As someone who has been assisting women in attracting their ideal romantic partner for over a decade I regularly see the downright erroneous information about that topic in pop culture. I feel the need to share my thoughts about the recent hit Netflix series, Love Is Blind. Before I do that let me explain why I ask our students in L2FL (Learn to Find Love) to generally avoid such programs. Programs like the Bachelor/Bachelorette work on a model of competition and scarce mentality that pit contestants against one another. With the experience of graduating hundreds of women from our course, I can reassure you that the right mate for you is just that – right for you and no one else. There’s no fighting another woman to win a man’s heart. In fact, we teach you why that notion is an indication that he isn’t the one. Secondly, these shows only leave women who aren’t perfect model types under the false impression that they have to look and act a certain way to be desirable. Love Is Blind is a little different and why I chose to share my musing about it. If you haven’t watched it, don’t worry I won’t be spoiling it for you.
One of the most frequently asked questions we get asked at LearningtoFindLove.com is if online dating is a viable option. With the new release this week in the U.S. of Facebook’s new dating app, I thought I’d add my opinion about the opportunity and challenges this might bring to social media users. Facebook Dating has actually been available in Argentina, Bolivia, Brazil, Canada, Chile, Colombia, Ecuador, Guyana, Laos, Malaysia, Mexico, Paraguay, Peru, the Philippines, Singapore, Surinam, Thailand, Uruguay, and Vietnam since last year. Facebook users in Europe will have to wait until 2020 to gain access. Before I get into the pros and cons let’s explore what Facebook Dating is and how it differs from apps like Tinder, Match, or Grinder.
Last weekend Craig and I were attending a conference in Texas. This annual conference is often a highlight of the year for us since we get to spend time with people we know and like who come from around the world. Once again this year we were approached by people in between meetings and breakouts who just wanted to express to us how happy they feel to see us together. They say things like, “I just love watching you two together” or “You really are an example of being in a loving conscious relationship”. Occasionally we will have someone ask us what the secret is and they are then struck by the simplicity of my answer, “Choose well and you don’t have problems”.
Here’s why this is such a radical concept for most people:
Let’s get personal about our self-care…
We’ve all heard how important self-care is, and there’s a ton of advice out there about ways to go about it. I’ll even leave you with a list of things you might consider in a future post, but first- I want to suggest a way to customize your self-care to YOU.
All you need to do, is take a look at what you’re already doing that brings you joy, that provides you with that escape from the stresses of day to day life. You might even mentally classify these things as a luxury, or an indulgence. Make a list of them… then start doing them more often. Don’t wait for a breakdown- schedule it!